The local telephone company defines happiness on their bill envelopes. View a larger image of the envelope »
the tao of telecom
who am I kidding, who am I fooling, when they be like: “what’s up Fatlip?”
And I say: “coolin’.”
“What’s Up Fatlip?” by Fatlip, formerly of hiphop group The Pharcyde is currently my choice for song of the year. It’s the saddest funny song I’ve heard in a while and it’s got a chorus you’ll be humming to yourself as you strut down the street (rocking a diaper or not).
Also: Some days more than others.
blind progress in the visual sciences
I think the logic goes something like this:
Premise #1:
1995 was better than 1985Premise #2:
T2 was better than TerminatorConclusion:
The higher the number, the better.
While I worry that much of what is happening in the world is powered by such logic, my concern today is more specific.
I read an article on News.com about upcoming software for the 3D Internet. I can’t wait to try to convince some online stamp store that they don’t need 3D walkthroughs of their stamps. It’s hard enough convincing people that they don’t need a cartoon at the start of every site.
Of course, there are good potential applications for the third dimension in computing, but as the ultimate computer weenie, Jakob Nielsen, says (roughly paraphrased) 3D is not always an efficient mode of navigation on a computer. For example, think how easy Quake or Doom would be if you just looked at a 2D map from above and click on the bad guys you wanted to kill.
* The first premise is subjective, but the second premise is clearly true.
pseudo-Canadians
I am always happy when I see a Canadian performer become a household name in the States. Whenever I see these Canadians I get this odd little feeling in my belly (specifically the ileum) which is national pride.
Oddly enough I get this same feeling around a select few Yankee Doodle performers. Does this happen to anybody else?
Consider the following foreign actors:
- Steve Martin
- Tom Hanks
- Robin Williams
I think they are Canadian.
There are a few more out of towners who radiate Canadian pride, but the names escape me right now. You know who I mean, however, let me know if you can come up with any others, I’m interested.
blue sky research.
I can’t believe I forgot to pimp my work which has surfaced on Forget Magazine. But then, you’re reading it every day anyway. Right?
Also. You must see this. But then, since I recently recommended this site which links to it you’ve probably already seen it. Right.
the screaming in my head.
The person who lives above me is in the midst of the world’s longest shower.
Fine.
Except the pipes in this building have recently started to make an unbelievably distressing high-pitched screaming noise which apparently only dogs and myself can hear.
Go to A Whole Lotta Nothing. Nice site. In case you don’t find it there, here is a picture of a cat.
Goddamn. The shower has not ended yet. Excuse me, I am about to instigate the world’s shortest and most violent confrontation.
suck on this you weasel. We’re going to Mexico.
Three bootlegged Beck songs you should obtain:
Mexico (live@KCRW)
An touching acoustic number about getting stoned and robbing a McDonalds.
One Foot in the Grave (live@W54th)
Some mean harmonica action accompanied by clever crowd banter.
Pulling up Roots (live with DJ Swamp)
No beck here actually. Just DJ Swamp rocking hard with the hard rock. Yeah. It’s like that.
Novocane (live@Muchmusic)
Beck screaming like the death-metal superstar you never knew he was. Also a discussion with Sook-Yin Lee about the current location of the fish he had for supper.
the internet advertising industry board of self gratification
The Internet Advertising Bureau (IAB) is not a regulatory board as you might think, but an association of internet advertisers making recommendations for themselves. Their latest recommendation: make banner ads bigger.
robots: fast as hell, still not so great with context.
The following email was sent from Network Solutions in regards to a domain name update request. I was aware that robots were sending emails, but I had thought we were still a few years away from the robots actually writing the emails themselves.
At least the robot was polite enough to wish us “Best regards”. Thank you, robot, but I don’t appear to be the first to have trouble with you and your “solutions”.
Thank you for responding to our Notify Template. Because you
omitted information from line 1a, we cannot act on your instructions.At the bottom of this e-mail, we’ve added the Notify Template with
our original information intact. In order for us to execute your
instructions, please follow these steps in this sequence.
- Hit the Reply button in your email program. Attention AOL users:
see below* before proceeding.- In line 0a, enter the Guardian method you chose
when you set up your contact record.- Based on what you entered in line 0a, make the
appropriate choice for line 0b:
- If you entered Mail-From, leave line 0b blank.
- If you entered Crypt-PW, put your plain text password in
line 0b.- If you entered PGP, leave line 0b blank, but be sure to
sign the template with your PGP private key.- If you agree with the modification request in its entirety,
reply to this email by inserting Y or YES on line 1a.
OR
If you disagree with the modification request, enter
N or NO on line 1a.- Do not remove the version number or alter the template in any
other way.- Hit the Send button in your e-mail program.
Best regards,
Network Solutions Registrar
help@networksolutions.com*AOL software prevents you from simply replying to this message.
Instead, follow these steps:
a) Highlight the entire message
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scrabble rules
It saddens me to think about how little Scrabble® affects our everyday lives. It is no longer “hip” to discuss Scrabble® with your peers. It has become like riding a moped, exciting, yet you hide it from your friends.
Last week I ordered a Deluxe Scrabble® set. Yes, that is the one with the redwood tiles, rotating gameboard with anti-slip ridges for the tiles, and a quality crushed velvet tile bag.
If you don’t want to go as balls out as I did (respect me for my possesions), there are many other ways to support Scrabble® in society:.
- This for example is an inexpensive Scrabble® board which can be easily hidden if your illiterate friends come along with thier favorite two by fours. Apparently it still functions like a normal board.
- If you are proud of your association with Scrabble, you should own one of these and wear it daily. Regardless of your gender. Be sure to check out the novelty socks while you’re there.
- If your street has covert “Scrabble® Nights”, a discreet way to summon new players is to post one of these babies at the end of your road.
AOV supports Scrabble®.