Author: Steven Garrity

humble, humble matthew

by Steven Garrity

Despite having an inflated self-image, aov’s own Matthew Dorrell has neglected to gloat about having a poem published UPEI’s student creative writing journal, Annex 2000.

Matt’s poem, Selling Vacuums is funny and upsetting. However, like all geniuses he is falsely humble and unhappy with the bounty of his quill (that’s what old pens that smart people used are called). He claims that the published piece is “in many little pieces and I have not as yet discovered how to re-assemble them properly”.

The world won’t wait. Ladies and Genderless, an aov exclusive (sort of), the newly revised version of Matthew Dorrell’s Selling Vacuums, previously published in UPEI’s Annex 2000:

Selling Vacuums

“This is the fourth one this week,”
she growls, walking towards the door
and the insistent doorbell.

“I’ve had it with the preachers,”
she grumbles, wearing her lips downwards,
listening to the incessant dinging.

Opens the door,
shouts:
“Superstitious science-fiction folklore!”
Silence.
Closes the door.

Not sure of what has happened,
the man, grey-suited, opens the mailbox,
places the catalogue inside.

Turning, he walks to the next house.
The man, grey-faced, is sighing.
Perhaps this customer will buy.
 

warning: involuntary microsoft promotion follows

by Steven Garrity

I hate to use the term technolust, but I can’t think of a better way to describe my feelings towards Microsoft’s new Tablet PC.

Microshaft's Tablet PC

I want one of these, bad. To absolve myself of consumer-culture guilt, I offer these totally unrelated items:

 

tonight: the real debate

by Steven Garrity

Tonight at 8:00PM EST on CBC Newsworld, home of Canada’s best TV show, Counterspin, be sure and tune into the Alternative Election Debate.

Five of Canada’s ‘other’ parties will be debating the issues (I get the feeling the “issues” might be somewhat different than the “issues” we are used to hearing about at election time).

The debate will include representation from for following parties:

The debate will be broadcast live on the web at 8:00 PM EST at both the CBC Election 2000 site and at The DemocracyChannel.net.

 

Ralph Nader, please come run Canada.

by Steven Garrity

I would like to formally invite you, Ralph Nader, to come run in the Canadian election.

In related news, Adam Horovitz (aka Ad-Rock of the Beastie Boys) and David Was of Was/Not Was (!!!) and their Grand Royal cohorts have offered up a fine Ralph Nader Remix of Countdown.

In the meantime, join the referendum to have Stockwell Day change his name to Dorris. This is classic 22 Minutes, but there is an important point here. However, I’m going to rob my point of any air of legitimacy it may have had by quoting a prime-time TV show about a different country, but I think there is a point in there somewhere:

“You know we forget sometimes, in all the talk about democracy, it’s a Republic. People don’t make the decisions, they choose the people who make the decisions. Could they do a better job choosing? Yeah. But when you consider the alternatives…”