One of the best descriptions of the American election I have read recently:

It hurts, doesn’t it? Being forced to choose between I guy who’s so smart that he’s a complete idiot, and a guy who’s so dumb he doesn’t even know he’s dumb – he’s like a dog who thinks he’s a person.

Wisdom like this could only come from one place. Suck of course. More specifically Filler, which appears on Suck every Wednesday.

And yes, I am aware the election has not officially been won, but let’s be realistic – it’s over.

A dead man has been elected to the senate.

I can’t even think of anything funny to say about this. You just can’t make stuff like this up.

To the 96,942,751 of you who voted for Bush/Gore: May you live with the consequences of your “decision” for years to come.

To the 2,647,464 of you who voted for Ralph Nader: Thank you. It was brave to vote for someone you knew wouldn’t be in office but still deserved your vote.

To the 174,294,659 of you who didn’t vote: May you live with the consequences the decision of the 100,648,835 who did, never complaining about politics, leadership or government until such time as you find it worthwhile to get off your ass once every four years.

In response to stupid man wins nearly interminable election

I’ll chime in to the chorus of Matt’s lady-friends throughout the years with the all-to-familiar phrase; “You’ve jumped the gun again matt!”

The election is still hanging on the Disney World State.

Thanks to adbusters for the image.

George W. Bush has won the American election. While I’m not entirely certain of how, or why, this is important to me, it seems bad. Ralph Nader got a miniscule amount of the vote, but expect liberals (the ideology, not the party) to continue to use him as a scapegoat. Good night.

While not having anything to base an opinion on is seldom an impedement to forming an opinion….

On second thought, I’ll not finish this post. It was just a bunch more words anyway. Essentially, the gist of my post was to be that the future of Napster is so fuzzy that commentary is useless. So no commentary.

Learn to read.

Nearly 100 Ways to Approach Infinity.
Two Stories my Parents Begged me to Tell Our Guests Towards the Beginning of my 25th Birthday Party But Insisted I Had Completely Invented.

These are both stories from McSweeneys whom I will continue pimping until they are popular, at which point I will no longer think they are cool. Also read the following which appears in Salon but is written by writers who have been featured on McSweeneys.