a lesson in propaganda from beautiful Portland, Maine

While spending a few days in Portland, Maine I had the unfortunate opportunity of watching some classic in-room american television. ESPN showed a military showcase and airshow that was the year 2000 equivalent to the now hilarious and frightening US and Soviet propaganda videos of the 50s. According to the hosts of the show it is a great opportunity for the military to mingle with the public and for the public to get a see “all the wonderful things that the U.S. Military is doing”. Don’t worry, young environmentalists, the smoke generated by the showplanes is ‘environmentally friendly’. I shudder.

On a more positive note, Portland is a beautiful city (despite the hideous buildings built in the last 40 years). I strongly recommend the Basket o’ Gritty Chips at “Maine’s original brew pub” Gritty McDuffs.

Oh, they still show Full House on TV here and the Olympics broadcasts are all a day old. God bless the CBC.

 

olympic review – part 2.

A continuation of the reasoning behind my lack of sleep.

Joanne Malar
Waterborne Women Defeated
The women’s waterpolo team was elminated from medal contention, finishing a disappointing fifth, after losing to the impressive Australian team.
Joanne Malar (pictured at right) and Marianne Limpert failed to medal, finishing fifth and fourth respectively in the 200 IM. I note that Mrs. Malar has yet to send me an email, and while I would like to post my phone number, it may not be a brilliant idea, what with all the wierd stalkers out there in cyberspace.

The Tick Fights for Justice
While perhaps more accurately described as a children’s cartoon show, and not a part of the Olympics at all, The Tick is nonetheless a fine television show. Any show in which the main villian is named “chair-face” is cool with me.

Synchronized Diving is a Foolish Sport
See title.

Americans are (Allegedly) a Bunch of Cheating Bastards
Countries regularly do independant testing of their atheletes. If the atheletes test positive for a banned substance, they are to be reported to the IAAF (International Amateur Athletic Foundation). Apparently, the States have not been doing this. America=Satan.

 

nothing says “kick my ass” better than pantaloons.

I suppose I could write up a description of this how-to guide, but a description has already been written, and I am a busy, busy man after all, so here’s a quote:

I don’t mean to brag, but I’ve never really had a hard time getting beaten up. However, for the longest time, after someone kicked my ass, instead of going to jail, as I would have preferred, that person would just go wash-up. That is until I read this guide that I’ve written.

Clearly, this man is a genius. Depending on you level of tolerance for disgusting pictures of the human foot, you should also check out the aptly named stinky feet wherein the author attempts to infect himself with athelete’s foot. Possibly the funniest thing I have ever read in the Internet. Again, not for the squeamish.